My New Approach

These past few weeks have been pretty darn good. Life finally feels as though its back to normal. For a while it was as if my life were frozen. I wasn't moving forward, and I wasn't moving backward either, I was just going through the motions of going to doctors, receiving medication, blood work... all that glorious stuff.

I've really been able to reflect a lot these past few weeks. Reflecting on where I was and where I am now. I have been able to see how many positive changes I have made in my life. I was able to talk to a friend about this. She drew me out a picture of what my life was like before and how I dealt with change, how the "coping behaviors" I was using brought me down, I knew I wasn't progressing, I was constantly feeling anxious. She then drew out a picture of my life now, and how even though I still feel similar emotions that come with life and changes, I deal with them in a more positive way. She said I have made connections (mental, spiritual, and emotional) in my life that have helped me and will continue to help me. I was in awe of how she was explaining it. I didn't really see the whole picture until she pointed it out. It was really neat.

I've also been taking the time to de-clutter my life even more. I went through all my books, movies, music, etc and got rid of so much stuff. Not that any of it was bad by any means. I've learned that most of those things don't do anything for me anymore. They don't leave me feeling uplifted or feeling like I have gained something positive. So, I got rid of them. It probably sounds silly to most of you, but for me, It's brought a sense of calmness to my life. I think those things can cause me to feel a sort of "sensory overload"..

I've taken a new approach that I thought about while doing this, I decided that the only "philosophies on life", or books in general, that I need comes from Deseret Book (haha) or the Apostles, Prophet, and Scriptures. Now, months ago, maybe even a few years ago, I NEVER would have chosen to do that. I used to live off of Music, Movies, Entertainment. The thought of getting rid of my Grey's Anatomy Seasons on DVD was ludicrous. But, I feel as though for ME, I have outgrown them. Now, I am not saying there is ANYTHING wrong with the show, or with music, movies, etc... It's just something I have done that has created a sense of balance in my life that is necessary for me to progress, stay calm, and not stress.

BUT, that being said.. I still am going to the Mumford and Sons concert.. because, I do love them :) and I think music, movies and such are okay and FUN, but for me it has to be in doses, and not all the time like it was before.

I guess I did this also because I really want to gain as much as I can out of life. I want to experience it in every positive way. I don't want to distract myself and miss out on any opportunities to grow...