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I had a thought occur to me as I was getting ready to begin my day today. Its probably no secret whatsoever that I am a very VERY anxious individual. Many of my close friends and my relatives and maybe even my acquaintances have all seen it at some point or another.
Anxiety is something that I have dealt with since I was a little girl. And something that I deal with on a daily basis. Its how my brain is wired. For years I would try and fight it, thinking that there must be something wrong with me. But, its just the way I was born. And I accept that. I have been able to learn different, healthy techniques to be able to deal with it. And I certainly have had so much help from Heavenly Father. Which I am entirely grateful for.
I have learned and am still learning that the way my mind works, is actually a blessing, rather than a curse.
Sometimes it doesn't even phase me, and sometimes it literally consumes my entire mind and body.
Honestly, lately, my anxiety has been much stronger and overpowering. But the last few days, I have taken the time (after a little cry session and pity party) to breathe and to do some introspection.

And I was reminded that. Anxiety, fear, discouragement, anguish, depression, all those negative feelings come from the adversary.  Its that simple. Christ and our Father in Heaven don't instill those feelings in us. They fill us with Peace, Comfort, Love, Serenity. Yes, he allows those negative feelings to be present at times, but it is up to us to accept that we have those feelings in the moment, and to learn how to balance having those emotions at times. But to also continue to go about our daily lives and become better and better people each day. I say to become better, NOT to become PERFECT. There is no such thing as perfection, and If someone tells you they are perfect or they don't have any faults, then they are totally lying. Having weaknesses, physical, emotional and mental weaknesses are all a part of this mortal experience here on earth.

I am also being reminded that typically when something amazing is about to happen to us, or maybe a big spiritual growth spurt is about to come about, the Adversary (satan) is aware of the amazing potential that we all have as children of God and he is going to do every single thing possible and in his power to cloud our minds and fill our hearts with anguish, confusion, and darkness. It literally scares him to know that we all have a divine potential in this life and he wants nothing more than to see us fail.
So he really will do whatever he can to keep us from doing so. And its totally scary to realize how easy it is for him to get a grip on us. But, the beauty is, that we can recognize and ask ourselves where those negative feelings are coming from.

I have to say that I am grateful for my weaknesses and for my adversities and challenges. Because of them, I am able to face them and overcome them, maybe not completely all at once. It honestly can take a few weeks, months, years or even decades. But, I am grateful because I know that by facing them and overcoming them little by little each day, I am becoming a stronger person.

A dear friend of mine shared this General Conference talk with me a few years back when I was going through chemotherapy. It is a talk given by Jeffrey R. Holland "Cast Not Away Therefore Your Confidence" It can be found on LDS.org along with many other amazing talks.

"... opposition turns up almost any place something good has happened. It can happen when you are trying to get an education. It can hit you after your first month in your new mission field. It certainly happens in matters of love and marriage. It can occur in situations related to your family, Church callings, or career.

With any major decision there are cautions and considerations to make, but once there has been illumination, beware the temptation to retreat from a good thing. If it was right when you prayed about it and trusted it and lived for it, it is right now. Don’t give up when the pressure mounts. Certainly don’t give in to that being who is bent on the destruction of your happiness. Face your doubts. Master your fears. “Cast not away therefore your confidence.” Stay the course and see the beauty of life unfold for you."

 

 

 I love this quote, it simply speaks for itself and can speak to any of us in different ways, depending on where I lives are.

 

I am grateful for the so much. Life really is a blessing and there certainly is much to be grateful for.